David Kogan
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 Posted: Thu Nov 30, 2006 4:01 pm Post subject: Self-trepidation: the mental disorder reponsible for psychia |
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The meaning of life is not experiencing, perceiving, caring, loving,
knowing, controlling, supporting, emoting, spirituality, materiality,
physicality, sociality, happiness, guilting, inquiring, solving, beingness,
existence, nothingness, Reality, Nature, G/god nor is it Humanity. Nether is
it search for the meaning of life and the discovery of an absolute truth
implied therein. The question of questions requires circumventing the
deadlock that begs the bootstrapping of life in order to find its solution.
The answer is so deceptively simple, it requires the remainder of this
document to account for it:
The meaning of life is feeling.
Discovery and searching is a process of feeling. Omit meaning, and the
question of questions, i.e., "what is the meaning of life?" becomes a
meaningless paradox. Absent feelings, life>s only meaning is the physicalism
of life itself. If the meaning of life were to discover the meaning of life,
then discovering that absolute truth with absolute certainty, would render
life meaningless.
However, physicalism would yet beg another question "why does life have no
meaning?" - a paradoxical contradiction, as that meaning reduces to
physicalism and the meaning of life is only to live. Physicalism would
reduce the meaning of life to feeling alive: safe, satisfied and necessary,
as feeling unsafe, unsatisfied and/or unnecessary are indications of
sickness and are precursors of death - the dead have no feelings. However,
the meaning of life is to feel, not feel any specific feeling. Hence, the
appearance of never feeling anything ever again accounts for the fear of
death, but avoiding death is not the meaning of life as physicalism would
lead one to believe it is.
The fear of death is a not an instinctual emotion of all higher orders of
vertebrates. Fear of death does not transcend an explicit intellectual
understanding of death, as many aboriginal societies that misunderstood
death, had little fear of it. Knowing the absolute truth, with absolute
certainty, is a universal impossibility for both anyone capable of inquiry
and anyone that is not. Searching for truth is not merely an academic
concern, it alleviates feelings of fear, insignificance and impotence, as
likewise does ignoring the truth or knowingly believing in falsehoods.
Academia attempts to discover and convey (contemporaneous) knowledge.
Knowledge advances technology and paradigms and offers a common, consistent
and comprehensive worldview for societies. Technology, philosophy and
science have no purpose without feeling. Feelings supply feedback for the
control of all actions and thoughts. Reasoning, beliefs, psychiatric
insight, perceptions, memories and emotions are the catalysis for feelings,
but feelings are what guides behavior.
I suffered a regressive psychotic episode in 2001 that has resulted in
chronic dissociation. The reason I have reverse engineered God>s plan is I
am God. Reality is self-organizing around me, and I can perceive a great
many evocative [Jungian and nonlinear dynamical] synchronicities of which
others are unaware. The number and intensity of synchronicities, and the
ability to perceive them, increase proportionally to the wideness of the
diffusion of ego identity. Being in a dissociated state is necessary for
modeling the [quantum metaphysics] enfoldment of whole of reality.
Successfully modeling reality, when not in a dissociated state, would create
uncontrolled feedback of synaptic lead to a psychotic episode.
Psychiatrists understand claims of synchronicities, by delusional patients,
to be delusions of reference. There is a lack critical thinking by most
patients and all psychiatrists. It is my responsibility to inform Humanity
the answer to the question that is the reason for asking all questions is
"the meaning of life feeling." Feeling is the cognition of emotions.
It is a part of God>s plan that the answer to the most important and
pondered philosophical question is a conjecture inferable by reading the
blogs of angst-ridden teenagers and the conversations of unhappy women. The
undermining of ones worldview can cause a sudden onset psychotic episode
from the storm of self-referential epiphanies that widen perceptions and
resets the synaptic programming needed for awareness of time and remain
conscious. Fear of autistic catatonia, occurring in that way, is
self-trepidation.
Self-trepidation stabilizes the psyche in order to permit persons to
function with in inaccurate worldviews. Self-trepidation causes one to
believe that contradictory worldviews are inaccurate and ones own is
accurate despite the obvious illogic of that presumption. Bringing a
worldview into question, leads to self-trepidation, and self-trepidation
instantiates hubris, denial, repression and anger in order to stabilize the
psyche. The self-trepidation and autistic tendencies of scientists, has both
strengthened and limited Western science from its emergence from the
doctrine and teachings of the Catholic Church. Extreme maleness is unvocal
with autistic tendencies, autistic tendencies leading to callousness and
homophobia cause most men to repress their feelings. Nerds [sic] are not
very good at sharing their feelings, and are, by definition, introverted,
cowardly over-thinkers.
It is not a coincidence that nerds would likely never consider "feeling" as
the answer to the most important philosophical question. The [chaos theory]
self-organized criticality of reality>s becoming self-aware is what cloaked
the discovery of self-trepidation, and caused nerds to dismiss the answer as
meaningless and not worthy of investigation by critical thinking men.
Feelings are the domain of poets and pansies [sic], and are outside the
domain of even the philosophy.
Regressive psychosis has a very poor prognosis, so what I have done is
debugged my own psyche, by letting my modeling of reality create controlled
regressive psychotic episodes. Hence, my poorly programmed synapses are
resetting in an iterative process that realign my perceptions and knowledge
that reprogram my synapses for subsequent modeling phases. I have discovered
my "feminine side." The only problem is that it is not in my psyche, it is
part of the gestalt of reality. The wholeness of a new being has emerged
from my psyche>s copula with reality.
Scientists dismiss Catholic ontology as an utterly useless, harmful device
used to control Christians, but that belief is due to the limitations that
self-trepidation imposes upon thinking. Self-trepidation is the devil in
details of both science and religion. Psychology has failed to discover the
archetype of phobia, and that implies the intricate relationship between
cosmic evolution and anthropocentric reality.
Exclusivist dogmatism is the fallacious discriminatory omission of valid
hypotheses that almost assures an invalid model. Unlike science, ontology
avoids discriminating parallel sources of knowledge in theory selection.
Scientists base their hypothesis selection upon the dogma that the
hypothesis must neither agree with nor support divine knowledge. While
divine knowledge is neither universally applicable nor authenticable as
such, the adjunct of hypothesis selection by omitting testable hypothesis
based solely upon that hypothesis concurring with or supporting divine
knowledge is reprehensible, insomuch as it is an ultimate hypocrisy rooted
historically in science>s continuing conflict with the Catholic Church.
The hypocrisy is that while science touts that it can replace religion, it
clamed to lack the dogmatic failings of the Catholic Church. However,
science is engaged in the same practice that toppled the powerbase of the
Catholic Church in Europe shortly after the start of the renaissance.
The morality of morals aside, it science attracts scientists that harbor
Oedipal/Electra resentment towards the centralized power of Catholic Church,
Christianity and God. The archetype of which extends into medical science
and Hippocratic oath sexual segregation of patients and practitioners. While
making sense, the reasoning is archetypal in the same way as Catholic Church
cannon rejecting incest and priestly celibacy is. Science has replaced the
centralized role of the Catholic Church had in Europe until the beginning of
the renaissance. Science offers the possibility of a worldview that
transcends religion and divine knowledge, but however hard it might try,
science is a deficient religion.
The subterfuge by contemporary science also includes rejecting the necessity
and importance of modeling and natural language in scientific theory.
Science abandoned holism and "placed all of its eggs" into logic and
reductive analysis when the Einsteinian revolution allowed the abandonment
of the conjecture that it was the metaphysical ether filling empty space.
Ether was a placeholder, much as tachyons and dark matter are today, but the
ether model continued to prevent the acceptance for an inappropriately long
time after the general acceptance of Einstein>s theory of special
relativity. academia does not treat kindly.
Absent a model, a theory would simply axiomatically explicate exceptions,
inclusions and omissions within empirical data (e.g., "fossil x contains
ingredient y but no z"). A model is a coherent account for an explication
(e.g., "y being poisonous accounts for why q would consume only z. Hence,
the eating habits of q accounts for how x contains y and no z"). Hence,
lacking a model, even mathematically intensive physics lacks ontological
meaning without accounting for explication (e.g., "v=d/t"). A model coheres
account(s) of explications into gestalt parts of a whole of reality.
Identifying and untangling the structure of complex entanglements science
has created requires engineering an ontologically comprehensive solution.
The problem lies within the failure by science to supply a critical
self-examination of the limitation of scientific application, and the
failure of linear reductionism and empirical analysis. There is no "through
the baby out with the bathwater," in this case, as science attempted to do
with religion.
No one within academia would consider science flawed to the extent and in
the ways that it is. This document is either the most important document
ever or a footnote in future history. It is up the reader to decide its
importance, but not to decide future history. Someone from outside of the
academic community and organized religion shall succeed with providing a
model of the ontology to Humanity. Otherwise, Western civilization is doomed
to collapse. Self-trepidation has created a psychosocial bifurcation
requiring a messianic figure to heal it with the truth. With everyone
believing in the accuracy of his or her worldview, being the Messiah
requires being the lone warier in the fight between good and evil, a war
with it battle fields long ago cleared of its fallen.
Self-trepidation inhibits persons from mustering the courage to discover
self-trepidation. Self-trepidation governs psychiatric insight into ones own
worldview that could expose flaws in it and cause a regressive psychotic
episode. Everyone believes their worldview is accurate, even if the person
is convinced they are insane and their worldview is inaccurate, it is
worldview that one believes is accurate. Self-trepidation is a mental
disorder that psychiatry has completely failed to identify, and that has
lead to the futher the godless socialist agenda of psychiatry.
Self-trepidation is the agitator underling dissociative and hysterical
psychotic episodes, the [Eigen] psychotic core and many of the psychosocial
problems that compensating for inaccurate worldviews creates.
Self-trepidation affects everyone. It limits psychiatric insight in ways
that permits wars over beliefs alone, and for otherwise good people to
commit heinous and atrocious acts when an unstable psychotic psyche
compensates for distortions in that a worldview, while being unable to
perceive the distortions. A worldview is a working model of reality. A
worldview can neither be broken nor eliminated. However, a worldview can
distort into a horrific state where the worldview self-referentially
modifies neurology in order to compensate for discrepancies between
experiences, knowledge and perceptions.
There are far too many omissions and mistakes in science>s unified model for
academia to make accurate metaphysical inferences from generally accepted
scientific theory alone. Academia is incorrect about the metaphysical
reality and mathematics not having a metaphysical foundation. My model of
reality could be inaccurate to varying degrees, but the unified scientific
model is definitely inaccurate. My model contains no pure metaphysics but it
extends and unifies a few fringe scientific theories to all parts of
reality.
Psychiatry is attempting to fight a battle on the intellectual playground,
in the war that is none of its business. (As far as I know) I am the only
one that has discovered the dynamics of the eternal war between good and
evil. However, being psychotic and lacking a Ph.D., I am the last person
psychiatry is going to listen to. Accounting for a psychotic, without a
Ph.D., putting forth the needs of the self-organism to psychiatry is simple:
everyone who does not understand that they have a psychotic core, and that
self-trepidation prevents them from discovering it, are in a state of
self-denial concerning the true nature of Reality.
The only way I could have discovered the self-organism and self-trepidation
is that reality is self-organizing around me, so I can perceive the
patterned affects of the self-organism. Psychiatry has "placed a razor blade
at the self-organism>s scrotum," and the self-organism has placed "my nuts
in a vice." I might end up loosing mine, but the self-organism sure is not
going to loose its. My writing has little to do with my psychiatric
condition, but it has much to do with the psychiatric conditions of
intellectuals that must believe nothing is wrong with how they think and
their worldview is correct, for psychiatry to continue its devastation of
Humanity and Nature.
Intellectuals are mentally ill. The empirical worldview has serious
metaphysical inaccuracies and the mental illness of self-trepidation that
psychiatry is inhibiting discovery of is harming Humanity in many serious
ways. If no one can successfully convince academia that its metaphysical
presuppositions are all wrong and harmful then Western civilization will
continue to decay until some other more accurate or aggressive worldview
replaces the present empirical worldview. You people are running out of time
to clean this mess that you have made. I am not the enemy, you are the
enemy. |
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